The one with the childhood lesson

I had these 3 friends: Herminia, Miriam, and Angie.  These girls are sisters and they lived in the house on the corner.  One sunny day I was allowed to join in on their fun in their backyard.  We played on the swing set, we ran around, we had fun.  I knew it was time to go home when my dad appeared at the gate in the fence. 

“Hilary, tell Bea [their mom] thank you for having you over to play.”

From me, silence.

“Hilary, it’s time to go home.  Say thanks.”

In my young little brain I thought, “I’m not ready to go home, so I’m not going to say anything.”  Instead, I ran out of the backyard, through a few front yards, and to the walkway in front of our house.  I knew my dad was running after me, so I turned around, stuck my tongue out, put my hands on my hips, and did a little na-na-na.  I continued my run to the front door, to my rescue.  It was locked.  I had to wait, defeated, for my dad to catch up to me and unlock the door. 

I got a spanking that day.  The only one I remember getting from my dad.  Lesson learned: Do as Daddy says.

The one with all the nut clusters

Locked In

By Ingemar Gustafson

All my life I lived in a coconut. 
     

It was cramped and dark.


Especially in the morning when I had to shave.


But what pained me most was that I had no way

 
to get into touch with the outside world.


If no one out there happened to find the coconut,


If no one cracked it, then I was doomed


to live all my life in the nut, and maybe even die there. 
     

 I died in the coconut.
 

    A couple of years later they found the coconut,


cracked it, and found me shrunk and crumpled inside. 
     

 “What an accident!” 
   

   “If only we had found it earlier...”
   

  “Then maybe we could have saved him.”
   

   “Maybe there are more of them locked in like that.”
 

    “Whom we might be able to save,”


they said, and started knocking to pieces every coconut 
within reach. 
 

     No use! Meaningless!

A waste of time! 


A person who chooses to live in a coconut! 


Such a nut is one in a million! 
   

  But I have a brother-in-law who 
lives in an 
acorn.

32 ounces peanuts, 3 pounds almond bark, german chocolate bar, semisweet chocolate chips.  That’s what I put into making peanut clusters.  Thank you crockpot for melting all those ingredients and thanks mom for helping me scoop all those clusters onto all those cookie sheets.

I made a trip home this weekend.  I started it off with visiting my cousin, his wife, and their sweet little daughter.  I wish I could have more moments spent with this cluster of folks.  They remind me of where I used to be and keep me grounded as I dream of where I will be one day.

I also saw a few dear friends that I see all too often.  During the visits with these darling people I listened to stories of hardships, dramas, surgeries, and even a few successes.  So often this weekend I was reminded of my past, my religious past.  At one time in my life I would have consoled by promising prayer or offering biblical words of wisdom.  Anymore, I find it difficult.  My heavy heart wants to promise and offer these things, but my weary spirit still questions.

I have encountered so many doubts and concerns, have heard so many theories and beliefs, have listened to so many debates and arguments that it is hard for me to know exactly what I believe.  But through all the questioning, this weekend taught me to believe something that I have always heard.  All you need is love. 

Whether love is making nut clusters with my mom at 9 o’clock at night, visiting my grandma in the nursing home (and taking her some nut clusters), listening to the troubles of my friends, buying a raincoat for my dad, finding old treasures in the basement, taking my dog for a walk, taking pictures of my goddaughters, catching up on tv shows with my husband, or reading a good book… All I need is love, clusters of love.