The One With the Pilgrimage: Colorado

Passing the "Colorful Colorado" state marker was a very gratifying sensation. I felt very accomplished in seeing that pass by my window.

Arriving in Colorado I had no real plan. I had no idea how long I would stay, I had no idea where I would go when I left, I had no idea of all the fun that was to be had. All I had was a list of people to see and a camera with which to take pictures of disc golfers. While on the subject, here are some of said photos...

I got into a pretty comfortable routine while away: wake up, eat a tiny breakfast, watch some of The Walking Dead marathon or History Channel, take a nap, get up for the day, drink beer somewhere, do something outdoors, and laugh with awesome people.

I laughed so much one night that my face ached terribly from all the smiling and my belly felt like it had been through a massive work out.

As far as working out goes, I did hike a mountain in Boulder. That experience is now one of my biggest accomplishments thanks to the best hiking buddy around. I stopped many times both to rest my wobbly and weak legs and to gaze at the awesome views. By the time I reached the top I was told that I had major bragging rights, so that is exactly what I am doing. I hiked all the way up a mountain. At the top was a picnic lunch and time for listening to the silence while preparing for the descent.

Even before the hike in Boulder my legs were wobbly and weak from trekking up the stairs at the Red Rocks Amphitheater for a showing of Catching Fire. A friend had agreed to meet me there but she had our tickets, so I planned to putz around and explore while I waited. There were so many thousands of people, however, that I became slightly overstimulated and decided to sit on a rock and wait there instead. After a fair amount of time waiting on the rock a very kind lady generously offered me an extra ticket to get in which I anxiously accepted free of charge. I cut in line with a Colorado native and began the slow walk up. 

Once in the amphitheater I decided to get popcorn and M&Ms for the movie and walk even further to the very top to watch the sun set before showtime. Seeing the sun and the moon both amongst the rocks was so cool. Watching the sun roll away gave me time to catch my breath before claiming seats. Although I had seen Catching Fire before, it seemed like an entirely different movie watching from such a different perspective and in the company of funny friends.

Other fun happenings while in Colorado: petting a horseshoe crab, playing games such as Scrabble and Shuffleboard, Fourth of July fireworks, mountain drives, watching kickball at City Park, listening to stories from my parents' glory days, and making new friends while catching up with old ones usually at a table with food and beer.

"We all need a place to feel free. The silence you can hear. The space between each heartbeat. A place to feel free." -Bearfoot

The One with the Pilgrimage: Kansas

The dull drive across Kansas is usually dreadful. It's flat, it's fields, it's boring. This time, however, it was different. The beauty of the sun's shine, the crispness of the clouds, and the unbelievably open road before me was intoxicating. As I crested a bit of a hill I actually felt a dizziness in my chest and in my stomach. It hit me in that moment that I was alone and that I was happy to be alone.

 Alone with my thoughts, alone with my crazy singing, alone with my decisions, alone with my finances, just alone. Alone, with the exception of the multitude of cows to which, in true Tapley Fashion, I honked at and hollered, "hey girls!"

Regularly, I do not enjoying doing much on my own. I like the company of other's and usually seek that out to eat, to shop, to run errands, to travel, to anything. This time, however, being alone was overwhelmingly freeing. After driving for more hours than I am accustomed to, I made it to a small town hotel and checked in somewhere in Kansas. Much to my dismay my room key did not work just like the last time I stayed at this similarly named hotel. Eventually, I got into my room and decided that I needed to eat. The lady at the front desk had recommend a family restaurant just down the road so my decision was made. The restaurant was a "please seat yourself" type so I chose a booth and sat down for my first lone public meal. There I enjoyed a BLT and pickle chips while I contemplated the first few days, people, locations, and experiences of my pilgrimage thus far. It was sure something to have driven the roads through so many locations that were once stomping grounds from my childhood.

After dinner I made my way back to the hotel, donned my bathing suit, went for a dip in the pool, and enjoyed more alone time there.

Kansas, specifically Wichita, was yet another place I did not schedule myself enough time. 

"Win or lose it's a hell of a game. The roads we choose, they all end up the same."- Peter Bradley Adams

The One with the Pilgrimage: Tulsa, OK

Tulsa was my second stop and unfortunately I did not schedule myself enough time there. What a blessing it was to stay with a dear friend from many many years ago. She, along with her husband and three kiddos, welcomed me in so graciously. They cooked a scrumptious dinner of home grown zucchini and brats, made a Sonic run for shakes, goofed around with the Wii, made the couch super comfy for me, opened a seat for me at Tea Time, gifted me some discs for disc golf, and openly chatted about (hippie) life. I love that family and one night was definitely way too short of a visit.

"Oh, won't you take me from this valley to that mountain high above." - The Civil Wars

The One with the Pilgrimage: Springfield, MO

Springfield was the first of my many stops. It was nice to laugh with friends that I have not laughed with in far too long, chit chat for hours while watching neat people lay a kitchen floor, play silly games with a little gal who calls me "Aunt Jo",  eat yummy foods with friends who put up with me when I attempt to read children's books in French, share wine and frozen donuts over hysterical conversations about church and spiritual experiences, and to visit the place where I used to work and get caught up on so much.

Although I missed Andy's Frozen Custard and failed in an attempt to visit a friend working at the hospital, I did manage to squeeze in a stop at Pineapple Whip. Springfield was the perfect place to kickstart my pilgrimage and my heart was so happy and blessed by my time there.

"If nothing else I can dream."- Over the Rhine

The One with the Photo Projects

Lately, I have had the pleasure of taking on a few photo projects and I am so thrilled with the results. 

The first two projects were birthday parties for kiddos, most recent of which was for my best friend's daughter. This precious little gal is one year old already!

Aaaand, I always love taking pictures of my own pups. Remy exhausted himself playing fetch outside while I clicked like a mad woman.

The One with T.H.E.E. Camp

See Ted at Panera. Rock out to old T.H.E.E. Camp CDs. Let me fill in that gap now.

I was out at dinner with my parents last night at Panera when a big man with a very familiar face walked in. I immediately knew the face although I thought myself crazy for believing my face recognition. After checking with my mom to see if she remembered Ted from T.H.E.E. camp, and hearing “Ted” over the intercom to announce that his order was ready, I decided that I would say hi. Saying “hi” when I run into someone in public is a really big deal for me- I do not like to do it. Confession- I often chose not to even bother with it.

Although I spent little to no one on one time with Ted, he was always one of my favorite people at church camp. He played in the worship band and told awesome stories one of which I remember hearing in the cafeteria during lunch when Ted chose to sit at my table of friends one day.

That to say, I was actually excited as I approached the food counter and introduced myself as a fellow T.H.E.E. camper. The very short conversation that followed was so simple yet genuine. I am amazed at the power of people and the power of connection (especially when food is involved). We quickly connected our dots and went our blessed ways.

Considering my current feelings towards church, religion, and the like, this encounter was a breath of fresh air. It was really neat for this man, who was simply in town visiting his family and out at dinner, to accept my greeting so eagerly and ask questions about my current life versus merely dismissing me as some teeny bopper church camper high on life and God.

This is my story, this is my song…

The One with Lake Therapy

Lake therapy always comes at a good time. The times when I feel lonely, impatient, overwhelmed, and sad. Staring out over the ripples in the water is calming to my soul and my brain. Even on the lake my thoughts keep running, however, the change in atmosphere attempts to offer a different insight. Being on the boat offers uninterrupted think time. And, even more so, uninterrupted time to capture a sunburn.

It is not a new revelation, but it is one that I am finally owning up to about myself- I would rather hold on to something that is good, even if I know that better may exist, than to say goodbye. I have done this with jobs, relationships, bras, just about everything.

Another revelation that is not new to me is that happiness is a choice. That said, I feel like I should be happy about the possibility that people keep reassuring me is awaiting. Their assurance will eventually sink in as truth, I know this, but for the moment I have too many emotions to work through before I have enough courage to make the choice to be happy. Through the good memories and uncertainties looming ahead (and now the insanely uncomfortable sunburn), sometimes happiness is the most courageous decision to make for the day.

Special thanks to these two for having a special way of loving me and being there to reassure me and invite me out on the boat...